


Super Bura

by orphan_account



Category: Dragon Ball
Genre: Dysfunctional Family, Even Krillin, Gen, Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2007-12-19
Updated: 2007-12-19
Packaged: 2017-11-15 16:47:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,539
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/529422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Vegeta's worst nightmare in the form of a dream? And Trunks is feeling angry and pubescent today. Two words, Bura Wins. This fic isn't drink friendly. It also isn't Vegeta approved.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Super Bura

Skyla Tribal's

-SUPER BURA-

Vegeta wasn't the most pleasant man to be around, even at the best of times. His disposition was often that of a grumpy dinosaur ready and willing to bite the head off the next idiot who dared to mess with him. There were but two people in the universe able to disregard the rotten side of his personality completely. One of those was Son Goku, who was immune to any terror there ever was and ever could be, including mass threats to the entire universe, indigestion, and Krillin's singing. And, of course, Vegeta's stink of an attitude. Speaking of which, the only other person in the world immune to Vegeta was his very own daughter, Bura.

Unlike Bulma and Trunks, there was nothing Vegeta could say or do to shake his squeally, 4-year old bundle of love. He had tried ignoring her, which proved ineffective when her chubby little arms found a permanent place braced around his left ankle. He had tried profanity, but the more vile his words were, the more she giggled. When she started parroting her disgruntled dad all about the house, Bulma threatened to never have sex with Vegeta for as long as he lived. She said that in front of Trunks, too, and the adolescent boy's mind was so corrupted with mental pictures of his parents doing the nasty that his face turned as purple as his hair, and he fainted.

Well, that's not really important. The point is, Vegeta could do nothing to distance himself from the ankle-ornament that was his daughter. At one point he resorted to-and I can't believe it either-reverse psychology! (Dun, dun, duuun... ) Unfortunately for him, the hugs and kisses and attention only encouraged his crazy little daughter, just like everything else! He was completely powerless against her, so he just gave up, placing him in a very irritated, bitchy... Vegeta-like mood. His daughter had forced him to love her. Forced!

What's worse, oh, nothing is as bad as the tale that is about to unfold. It started on a morning, fog-laden, honking horns, and Bulma being all distant and menopausal. Vegeta didn't ask. If there were no sex, he was entirely content to sleep in bed alone. That's just the way a true Saiyan rolled.

Yet nothing could have prepared him for how he had awoken. Unbeknownst to him, little Bura had sneaked in per request of her mom to "Get Daddy's pissy ass out of bed, please." Of course Bura complied happily, where Trunks avoided his mother's cruel, boarder-line suicidal request like the plague.

This brought Bura to his sleeping establishment, which he called a Chamber of Royal Rest when he thought no one was listening. First, Bura tried singing a number of Uncle Krillin's favorite karaoke songs, including "I Wanna Be Your Puppy", "Sugar Drop Lollipop", and "Banana Phone" but her father didn't even stir. Then she tried bouncing up and down on Vegeta's bed, also to no avail. She even tried dripping the remaining drops from his beside water glass onto his eyelids, but she missed and hit the silly little upside down triangle his hair made instead.

There was only one thing left to do. It was a move she normally reserved for Trunks-who was just as stubborn a sleeper-as a wake up call. No one knew of her super special technique, because Trunks was too ashamed to admit it to anyone. Even Goten! (Especially Goten.)

What Bura had done was as simple as counting to three. She crawled under the bed, lifted it above her head, and dumped her father out.

Vegeta hit the floor with a very loud "THUD", and Bura tossed the bed over her shoulder as if it were just another one of her dollies. She giggled incessantly at the enraged tangle of limbs and blanket that was her father.

"Daddy went THUD," she said, giggling as her father cursed and lifted himself up off the floor. "THUD, ha ha ha ha ha ha!"

"Quiet you!" he said, pointing toward his daughter. Wait, Bura? She was rolling on the floor laughing. Floor his bed should have been occupying, no less. Just what in the name of Planet Vegeta was going on here?

"THUD! THUD!"

"You didn't just... " he started, finally noticing half his bed speared through the wall. Back years, and years, and years ago on Planet Vegeta they had invented bed-proof walls to avoid such incidents. Although, this wasn't Planet Vegeta, nor was it years, and years, and years (suddenly Vegeta felt woefully old) ago. "It can't be... "

"Mommy says breakfast is ready! Breakfast!" she said, mouth watering and everything. She grabbed Vegeta by the finger and pulled him out of the bedroom.

He had quickly disregarded the bed-through-the-wall incident, and if anyone asked he had somehow done it himself in his sleep.

That was, until he and his daughter reached the stairwell.

"Race you down, Daddy!" said Bura, standing at the tip of the top step on her toes. Vegeta didn't even entertain the thought of it until she made like she was going to fall down the steps. A sudden rush of paternal adrenaline shot down through his arm, but it wasn't fast enough to grab hold of his falling daughter. If he had a chance to curse his pathetic weakness, and disbelief that the Earth had made him weak, he would have, but he didn't. Instead he watched his little girl do effortless somersaults down the the stairs until she reached the very bottom. At the end she went "Ta-da!" but was put off by the fact that Vegeta hadn't even tried to race her. Sometimes he could be a real meanie!

She was so mad, in fact, that she punched an entire wall down, and there was the kitchen. Bulma stared out, stunned to speechlessness, whereas Trunks looked as though he had just seen a ghost.

"Vegeta! What have you done?!" hollered Bulma, once she had been alleviated of her previous shock. Sure, she looked at little Bura with her fist shot straight out, but completely ignored the possibility that it could be anything but Vegeta's fault.

The the bemused Saiyan just ignored his fuming harpy of a wife and took his seat at the breakfast table. He was trying to register all of the events that had taken place in the last few minutes. So Bura's Saiyan strength was starting to show. Well, that was a relief. After all, Kakarot not only bested him in that he was the strongest man in the universe, but also in that both of his kids were Super Saiyans, while Trunks was his only one. Vegeta had allowed his daughter's appearance to get the better of him. Sure, she might be half-human, and she may look exactly like Bulma, who wasn't a warrior, but she was still half-Saiyan. Vegeta couldn't believe he had disregarded his own child's heritage for a minute there. He really was getting old, and this stupid planet was sapping him of his Saiyan pride more and more every day. It was too long since he had last fought in a great battle.

"Mind telling us who's going to be spending the rest of the day fixing that wall, Vegeta?" asked Bulma, placing a plate with five steaks, a mountain of mashed potatoes, and various veggies, a light meal. Apparently some of the clunky Capsule Corp. robots had malfunctioned and Bulma had to cook everything. It would explain why everything tasted like burnt rubber, but he would rather eat horse shit than listen to Bulma yell at him anymore than she had that day, so he didn't say anything; however, he did have better things to do than to fix the stupid wall.

So when Bulma was out of earshot, probably off to dye the One Grey Hair on her head, or whatever, Vegeta pushed his empty plate aside and stood up.

"Bura, your power is incredible," said Vegeta. Her big blue eyes stared up at him in wonder, as though he were speaking another language. She looked so freakishly innocent. To the normal eye, this little girl couldn't possibly possess an ounce of a Saiyan warrior's blood, but Vegeta was hardly normal by human standards. After all, he wasn't an Earthling. "How would you like to go out today and learn to harness your Saiyan strength?"

"My Saiyan strength?" She blinked and tilted her head sideways. "What's a Saiyan strength?"

"Surely you're joking!" said Vegeta, and he proceeded to launch into a very elaborate explanation of the great Saiyan race, how he was the mighty prince, blah-blah-blah-blah. You know what I mean. You've heard it all before. Apparently Trunks had, too, seeing as he fell asleep during his father's emphatic telling of their heritage. Frankly, the only part that surprised him was that he'd never explained this all the Bura before. After all, she did follow him around everywhere he went.

At the end of it, Vegeta asked, "Any questions?"

Trunks popped awake just in time to hear Bura ask, "Do I get candy if I win?"

It took a moment for Vegeta to process this question, and went it finally hit him, he hit the floor, and was twitching. How could he have possibly allowed his own child to become so dense? He would have to teach her everything he knew, as he had once taught Trunks, and-and make it so that she could make mince meat out of both of Kakarot's sons! Well, maybe just Goten... and definitely Pan! No way a half-Saiyan could lose to a mere quarter-Saiyan.

"The training starts now!" said Vegeta, and Trunks almost felt mean enough to allow his father to just walk out the door in his underwear, but the fact that he let himself laugh at the "Strange Man in His Underwear Flies Over West City" mental headline made Vegeta wary. Then the prince looked down and noticed his lack of pants. He punched Trunks in the head to shut him up and told him he'd take two minutes to become battle ready.

Twenty minutes later Vegeta emerged in his typical fighting spandex, and he handed Bura a little spandex outfit that she went to try on immediately. Trunks refused to wear spandex for the rest of eternity, seeing as the one time he had during the World Martial Arts Tournament, some large, hairy old dude groped his behind, causing Trunks to explode with rage. Stuff happened. Violent stuff. Stuff that would make this fic's rating increase quite a bit due to the sheer gore factor. For once Vegeta was extremely proud of his son, and everyone else was afraid. Hell hath no fury like a half-Saiyan's scorn. Man, he felt like a woman (da-DA-da-DA-da-DA-DA!)

But just because he didn't have to wear the spandex didn't mean Trunks wasn't forced to go with Bura and Vegeta anyways.

"Why do I have to go?" he asked in mid-flight, and received no answer. There were plenty of things he could have done back at the house, like tinkering with his perfect robots, flossing his perfect teeth, combing his perfect hair, or perfectly fixing the wall so Vegeta wouldn't have to (because he didn't want to hear his parents squabble over that later.) But Vegeta wasn't exactly known for his common sense, just his bad attitude and poor choice in clothing (everyone who has ever met Vegeta surely has the shape of his spandex, or leather-clad ass engraved into their skull.) Trunks had inherited his own fine ass from both of his parents, hence the reason he could not wear spandex, nor shower near anyone in the boy's locker room.

When Vegeta caught Trunks blushing, he lashed out.

"What is your problem, boy!? Saiyans don't blush. Quit shaming our royalty!"

"Mommy said Trunks is poopescent on the phone with Mrs. Kakarot," said Bura with a giggle. "I think that means he poops a lot."

"I do not!" said Trunks, causing him to blush even more. "I mean, not that you all needed to know that or anything. Besides, she said P-U-Bescent, not... you know... shit... "

"Enough of this nonsense!" said Vegeta, stopping right over a convenient land of emptiness that always seems to show up in mid-flight during ultimate fights of ultimate doom. He was going to test Bura's strength, train her to harness it, and turn her into the ultimate warrior that Trunks once was before he started going to that whatcha-ma-call-it high school whatsits. All that place had was weaklings, morons, flatulence, and women far more beautiful than Bulma, but if Vegeta was attracted to beautiful women he would have never married her. Women weren't made on Planet Vegeta to be beautiful, just tough. And stubborn. And evil. He got horny every time Bulma (thought she) was being fierce. Both times he had gotten her pregnant involved sniper rifles, Gundams, and Chuck Norris. One of them even involved Krillin's singing, hence Bura's evil cuteness that was evil.

But I digress. Even though they had discovered the perfect spot to kick some royal posterior, Bura refused to fight until her father answered this question:

"Daddy, what's pubescent?" she asked. Vegeta smacked his forehead and grumbled. It was all Trunks's fault for inheriting human traits of puberty. The boy cried for three days when he sprouted his first pimple along his hairline, the pussy (Bulma said she cried for six when she got her first pimple, but she was merely a human, so that was perfectly acceptable.) Real Saiyans didn't get pimples during puberty. Instead they bled from the mouths and spit it into the eyes of their adversaries! And ChiChi thought Gohan was dying during puberty. That woman really was clueless.

"If I tell you, will you beat the "pubescence" out of your brother, princess?" asked Vegeta. He really was in the mood to see Trunks black and blue all over for developing into such a weakling.

"Yeah, I'll beat the poop out of him!"

Then Vegeta proceeded to explain the whole story of how she came to be conceived, and one day she'll be a real Saiyan woman and bleed from both ends. Err. Vegeta's not a very sensitive father, in case you haven't noticed. In any case, by the time he was finished, even Trunks knew a few new things... and wanted to slowly kill himself somewhere because of it. He really didn't need to know that his parents had done that, that, and especially THAT. UGH! It was too much. He had to go puke, like, now.

"Your enemy is weak, Bura. You can take him!" cheered Vegeta, in a very rough Vegeta-like way. While Trunks was in the middle of trying too hard to puke, Bura round-house kicked him right in the jaw, pummeled his stomach, and tossed him into the nearest random pillar. He didn't bother to pull himself out of the pillar. He just kinda hung there and hoped to die like the angsty teenager that he was. That really pissed Vegeta off.

"TRUNKS!"

Vegeta blasted the pillar to smithereens, and all the debris fell with his limp son attached to it. He thought his son had died for a moment there, until Trunks shot up to the sky, piping mad. He may have been going through human puberty, but having his personal space invaded and the mental picture of his parents getting it on looping through his thoughts channeled every bit of Saiyan rage inside of him. He was going to take his dad head on, but Bura stepped in and said in a squeaky little voice, "Your fight is with me, fool!"

"Get out of the way, Bura! This is a fight between two Super Saiyans!" said Trunks, hair bursting into spikes of shiny gold. Bura stood her ground, though, and charged toward her brother as quickly as she would toward a triple scoop of strawberry ice cream with fudge and almonds on top. Trunks was so dead for secretly stealing her super secret blond trick behind her back.

Imagine the look of shock on Trunks and Vegeta's faces when little Bura shot up to Super Saiyan as if she had done it a million times before. She was only a baby! There wasn't a being in the universe who could harness so much strength into one tiny little half-human body, but appeared that Bura was the first. Trunks didn't even have the chance to pick his jaw up off the ground when his little sister shot toward him like a golden arrow, and pierced through his defense with punch, after kick, after punch, after energy beam, after punch, after ow, after oh crap, after it's-not-supposed-to-bend-that-way, after this can't be happening, after chainsaw noises, after a woman screaming, after the sound of a building burning down, after explosion, after a Raffi concert, after punch, after kick, after... well, you get the idea. Trunks was hurting pretty badly afterward. The worst part was that he eventually tried fighting her back for real, and just couldn't. She was too skilled, too powerful, too much.

Vegeta had never been more proud to be a father.

"Bura, you are a magnificent warrior! Unbelievable! To have surpassed your brother in such a short amount of time." If Vegeta cried, which he never has (except for that one, or two, or five times), this would be the time to do it. He was beaming with so much pride for having produced such a powerful seed, why, he was feeling to urge to go back to space and try taking over the universe once more. With his daughter only. Trunks wouldn't be able to come because he was receiving his edumacation-whatsits. Some human crap.

Speaking of Trunks getting owned, that meant Goten and Pan were owned by default, meaning two of the three brats Kakarot was "responsible" for were surpassed by his precious. Booyah!

Err, he didn't really say booyah. He just thought it. And was very ashamed of himself afterward. But not as ashamed as he was proud, so it didn't matter.

Just as Bura's fine, blue hair flickered back, in came Kakarot and his younger son out of nowhere. That instant transmission needed to die in a fire because it startled the daylights out of Vegeta, not that it showed because only weaklings showed their fear. Kakarot couldn't have showed up at a more perfect time (well, really he could have, but Vegeta has no common sense, remember?) because Vegeta was feeling so proud and so mighty that he could have taken on the universe. And wanted to. Where was that blasted ship?

"Hey Vegeta, what's shakin'?" asked Goku, as though he and Vegeta were old buddies that saved the universe together back in the day, scored with hot babes, and partied like it was 666, the year Planet Vegeta was destroyed. I couldn't imagine why.

"Kakarot, you've come just in time to witness the glory that is... " but before Vegeta could finish, Bura clung to his leg and yawned.

"Daddy, I'm sleepy."

Well, it was going to have to wait, then. She would be at her ultimate splendor and glory fully charged, bright-eyed, and bushy-tailed. He let her rest on his shoulders like the sometimes-good-father that he was, and told Goku, "I assume you sensed an unfamiliar power level and that's why you've come."

"Well yeah, and ChiChi told me to make the rumbling next door stop before our house fell down," said Goku with a sheepish grin. Vegeta couldn't believe the way this guy took orders from his woman. Was he a Saiyan, or was he a Saiyan? Also, right next door from Kakarot's house? Come to think of it, Kakarot did live quite literally in the middle of nowhere. It was destiny that Kakarot should face the fact that Vegeta was simply better than him in all ways, especially when it came to having powerful children.

Although he wasn't too proud of Trunks at the moment, who laid unconscious after being beaten within an inch of his life. Goten swung one of Trunks's arms around his shoulders and lifted him into the air, glaring at Vegeta.

"You didn't have to beat him up so hard," said Goten, trying to look tough when really he never wanted to tango with Vegeta. Ever. Ever. EVER.

"I don't know, Goten. That force we sensed, that didn't feel at all like Vegeta," said Goku, then his face started to light up. "But it sure felt strong. Just as powerful as Vegeta. Maybe even more so!"

"No way!" said Vegeta.

On the way to Goku's house, Vegeta explained all that had happened that morning, minus the parts that were embarrassing, like getting dropped out of bed, and failing to catch Bura as she somersaulted down the steps. Goku thought that his story was incredible, but Goten just laughed and laughed and thought Vegeta was going senile due to old age. Vegeta had him know that Saiyans could live up to three times as long as humans, and that he wouldn't truly become "old" until he was around his 250's or so. But Saiyans dying of old age was extremely rare, due to the 99-percent chance of them dying in battle (that was, before Frieza blew up their planet, the rat bastard.) Now 99.99-percent of them died in genocide, some were brutally murdered for their insolence, and the rest would die of old age. It was very un-princely for him to grow old, but he could make it princely if he said so because he was the prince, damn it.

Anyway, they arrived to Goku's house in no time at all. After listening to ChiChi screech like a harpy, she proceeded to make an enormous lunch to quench the Saiyan appetite. Vegeta had a new-found respect for that woman when she worked in that kitchen. The house was very quaint, and it smelled so good. In fact, it was much better than the metallic, science-infested dome Bulma had him living in. How dare Kakarot have a better house than he, even if it looked inferior on the outside!

Trunks sprung to consciousness just in time for lunch, and the table of four Saiyans and ChiChi dove right in, wolfing the food down as quickly as they could. ChiChi was especially quick, knowing she would not only be the first one full, but would end up having to cook more once all the food was gone. As she thought, four simultaneous requests four seconds came her way, and she was working right at it. It was so nice to have guests over for once, even if one of them was that awful Vegeta. For goodness sakes, his little girl was barely out of diapers and look at the condition she was in! He'd done the same thing to poor Trunks, too. Lucky for him Trunks was growing into a mild-mannered boy, very polite, handsome, and almost as intelligent as his mother (which was her only good trait... aside from that fact that she was kinda beautiful.) ChiChi didn't know if that woman appreciated her wonderful son enough. She knew for a fact that Vegeta didn't. Yet Vegeta somehow was a friend of the family, like Piccolo, Tien, Yamcha, and anyone else who may have opposed Goku at some point. Goku had weird taste in friends.

When she started serving seconds she noticed that Bura was beginning to stir awake. Gosh, she was so cute. ChiChi was jealous, since she never got to have a daughter, hence the reason she stole Pan from Gohan every chance she got. Oh, but she couldn't today because little Pan had a photo shoot with that horrible Hercule. Honestly, that man and Videl were nothing alike at all. You could almost question whether or not they were blood-related. Keh, in-laws.

"Goten," said ChiChi, just as he was about to help himself to some more rice. He looked up, then down at his delicious food, then up again. And blinked. And went right back to eating. All within an eighth of a second. He managed to get a few chunks of rice in before his mother addressed him again, this time yanking him away from the table. "Go check on Bura and make sure she's all right."

"Aww, Mom. C'mon, I'm hungry!" he whined, watching as his father, his best friend, and Vegeta munched on all the good stuff, leaving the peas for him. Goten hated peas. They were the only food in the universe that he hated, too.

"I know my wonderful little Goten isn't being insubordinate, is he?" That last part froze whatever little hunger was left inside of him. He didn't care what anybody said. His mother was the single most frightening person in the universe.

So he walked into the living room where Bura was waking up from her nap.

Now, even though Bura was only four, if there was one thing she got from her mom (aside from being her chibi clone) it was her like of good-looking boys. Now Goten was no super model, or anything like that, but in his own way he was very cute, extremely handsome, and would make the perfect Prince Charming, unlike stupid Trunks. Bura decided that one day she was going to marry Goten, actually. In fact, now that she had him alone for once, she thought she'd inform him of that.

"Hi Goten!" she said, in the cutest voice that she could muster. Despite his hunger, Goten couldn't help but smile. She was just so darn cute. "Guess what?"

"What, sweetie?" he asked, clearly unaware of her intentions. Bura blushed, giggled, and nearly swooned. Nearly. The Saiyan in her wouldn't allow it, unfortunately.

"We're going to get married some day!" said Bura, completely sure of this. Now, like Trunks, Goten inherited the pubescence of a human, so he was horny and ready for action, instead of ready to spit blood and... whatever else Saiyans in puberty do. Something tells me that it would be best if we didn't know, to save the images of Goku, Vegeta, and especially poor Gohan. But anyway, unlike Trunks, he didn't know how to deal with little girls (contrary to his belief, Trunks didn't know how to deal with her either.) So all Goten could do was laugh and say, "Yeah, sure you are, kid."

"I'm not a kid. I'm a woman," said Bura, intensifying Goten's laughter ten-fold. Didn't daddy tell him she was a Super Saiyan? Well, yeah, duh, but Goten was too dumb to believe it (or, in his opinion, he'd be dumb if he DID believe it! No offense to Goku, though.)

"I'm-I'm sorry. You're too much! Please don't take it the wrong way, but... "

But it was too late. Bura was already crying. What's more, she was powering up. What he had thought was Vegeta's power from earlier turned out to be her's after all. When the house started shaking, everyone ran into the room in time to see Bura ascend into Super Saiyan. Goten's mouth gaped, Goku grinned excitedly, and ChiChi fainted. Vegeta was beaming with pride, and Trunks seemed to be the only one who wanted her to stop, but after getting his candy ass handed back to him earlier, he really didn't feel like approaching her.

"W-what I m-mean is... well, Bura, what would... Trunks... thinkkk... "

Trunks mentally cursed himself, wondering why the hell Goten had to bring him into all this. Now they were both dead if she didn't calm down.

Her tear-laden teal eyes surfaced from their enraged stupor, just in time for ChiChi to regain consciousness. Of course, the proud mother of two didn't plan to be hit with this question. "You're gonna marry Trunks, Goten?"

And then ChiChi fainted again. Not that she didn't approve or anything. She fainted when she found out Gohan and Videl were getting married, too.

But if you think her reaction was bad, Trunks's face was beet-red, and Goten was trying not to laugh, seeing as laughter got them all into this mess in the first place. Vegeta caught Trunks blushing, too, and jumped to the wrong conclusion just like that because, apparently, this just wasn't Trunks's day.

"I KNEW it! I knew you had a thing for the spawn of Kakarot. How dare you fall for someone who's clearly beneath you!?" said an outraged Vegeta. Trunks met his father's gaze with a look of stricken horror, and Bura's power just continued to rise in all her sorrow. After all, her big brother was always the one that got the attention. He got his own sword, and a time machine, and all the Son boys admired him so. He got to fuse with Goten, fight off evil with his super powers of doom, and-and he got an important part in Dragon Ball GT! Don't ask me how she knew all that, especially at such a young age! The point was, her brother was a better princess than she was, and for that he must pay.

With his life.

"Calm down, Vegeta. We should celebrate our sons' engagement! Love is a beautiful thing, right ChiChi?" ChiChi, of course, couldn't answer because she was unconscious on the floor. "I'm sure she'd agree if... OMIGAWD."

Kakarot never OMG'd in his life, so Vegeta HAD to see what got his attention then. He just couldn't believe his eyes when his daughter finished powering up. First of all, the house was completely obliterated. Second of all, she had ascended into Super Saiyan 3.

"For the last time, Dad, I'M NOT GAY... huh?" Trunks looked up in horror.

"C-come on, Dad. It's nice that you're supportive and all, but we ar- OH?" Goten looked up in horror.

ChiChi woke from her unconscious state once more just to see the precious home-the home she had put all of her heart and soul into-destroyed. She didn't faint this time, though. This time, she had gotten so beyond pissed that the heavens cried. She pulled the biggest machine gun in the world quite literally out of nowhere and charged at Bura.

The result wasn't pretty. All I can say to keep this fic's rating where it's at is... Goku hoped the dragon balls could fix that.

"NOW YOU DIE," hollered Bura in a sinister man's voice. Everyone watched in terror as she gathered an energy ball the size of a country in the sky. It was glowing blood red, and sparks and lightning were crackling around it. How in the names of Kami, Dende, Cheese, Crackers, Mario, and Luigi could this have happened? Goku and Vegeta thought they could stop it if they fused into Gogeta and worked together (well, it really wasn't Vegeta's idea, but he had to calm his kid down somehow); however, a Gogeta Ka-Me-Ha-Me-Ha wasn't enough to block the energy ball, so the whole planet was destroyed!

\---

Vegeta, for the first time in forever and a day, woke up in a panting cold sweat. Goodness, it was only a nightmare, and a pretty crazy one at that. He laid in bed with Bulma on the other side for a change, and Bura sleeping peacefully in between them. Gosh, she was so innocent, and... sweet-looking. Half-Saiyan or not, she just could never come close, would never even compare with her brother. Vegeta had always known that, and finally he was happy for it. His little girl didn't need to become an almighty warrior to make him happy. That worried him a bit, but you know what? He was just going to have to deal with it. And deal with it he would.

He checked four or five times to make sure Bura and Bulma were still asleep, and gave Bura a quick peck on the forehead. Then he dragged himself out of bed and toward the door. He had to pee, and then work out in the Gravity Room for several hours (or days) to take his mind off of that crazy dream. Besides, he was slacking off in his training. What was he, a couch potato? He still had Kakarot to defeat.

As soon as the door shut with a click, Bura's eyes snapped open. She really, truly was the picture of happy innocence. In fact, she could still feel the moisture from her daddy's kiss, and planned to use that against him sometime. After all, it was her fault that he loved her so.

She'd leave him alone for the time being, though. He was in a daddy-needs-to-be-alone kind of mood. Those were actually rare, though he seemed to think they were every minute of every day, silly daddy. Still, she wanted attention, and her nearest source at the moment was Bulma.

So she crawled under the bed, lifted it above her head, and dumped her mother out.

"Ouch, what the.. !? VEGETA!?" hollered Bulma, witnessing her bed speared through the wall once more. Of course, Vegeta was nowhere to be found. Instead, she found Bura on the floor giggling her little head off.

"Mommy, Mommy, come look at my trick! I can make my hair go blond if I pretend like I have to poop really, really hard!"

Bulma watched her daughter ascend into Super Saiyan and screamed.

-FIN-

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: DBZ belongs to Akira Toriyama, Banana Phone belongs to Raffi, Gundams belong to pretty mech pilots, Goku seems to believe that Goten and Trunks belong to each other, Luigi and Mario belong to Nintendo, and Chuck Norris doesn't belong to the world, but the world belongs to Chuck Norris.


End file.
